SILENT NIGHT

This is my favorite Christmas song, sung by my favorite singer, set to pictures of my favorite people.

CHRISTMAS EVE - 1963

The video below is from Christmas Eve 1963 at 2288 Beckley Rd. My God, that is 46 years ago and I was 2 1/2.

Each year Grandpa Willi would disappear to go feed the horses - always just missing Santa Claus.

I have noticed in most of the movies I had recently watched, the evening always ends with me doing the twist.

THE GOLDEN GLOBES GIVE IT UP FOR GLEE

What do you get when you cross clever dialogue (everything out Jane Lynch's- Sue Sylvester's - mouth), crazy situations (Will's wife's fake pregnancy), great vocals (Matthew Morrison and Lea Michele) and some of the best songs of the past 40 years - Don't Rain on My Parade)?

The answer is : GLEE!!!!

And today they were all nominated for the Golden Globes... Best Comedy, Best Actor, Best Actress and Best Supporting Actress....

Congratulations and I cannot wait for your return in APRIL.........

SCHWETTY BALLS

Since I first posted this two years ago the clip has been removed from Blip.TV and Youtube. It is now only hosted at Hulu.

This is my favorite SNL skit and it is so appropriate since it is the holiday season and all.

MANY AMERICANS TOO FAT TO COMMIT SUICIDE

LOS ANGELES—A report published Monday in The New England Journal of Medicine warns that the nation's obesity epidemic has reached a new level of crisis, with many overweight Americans' increased girth rendering them physically unable to end their own, fat lives.

"We've known for some time that obesity can cause heart disease, diabetes, strokes, and other potentially life-threatening illnesses," said report author Dr. Marjorie Reese, director of UCLA's Obesity Pathology Clinic. "But the fact that obesity impedes suicide is truly troubling. It appears that the more reason people have to die, the less capable they are of doing so. They are literally trapped in their grotesque, blubbery bodies."

Of the one-third of Americans classified as obese, the report estimated 29 percent are too heavy, immobile, or both for suicide to be a viable option. This figure is up from 18 percent in 1996.

A full 70 pages of the report focus on suicide methods that are taken for granted by persons of normal weight but often present insurmountable challenges to their corpulent counter- parts.

For example, hanging oneself is most often out of the question. The report notes that a disturbing percentage of the obese are too large to ascend a footstool, too inflexible to kick it out from under them, and even if they could, are too heavy to remain atop it long enough to put their giant, flabby necks through a noose before the footstool shatters into splinters under their massive girth. Plus, as Reese writes, "even if all other variables were eliminated, the weight of these enormous individuals would probably break any indoor light fixtures or attic roof supports to which they might tie a rope."

Overdosing on narcotics is also impossible, according to Reese.

"Body fat absorbs toxins, so fat people simply cannot ingest enough bottles of sleeping pills to have any effect, much less stop their hearts," Reese said. "And slitting one's wrists in the bathtub is not an option if you can't find a butcher knife thick enough to reach the arteries under your rolls of wrist flab, or can't fit into the bathtub in the first place. All the self-loathing in the world is not going to help the obese get their meaty index fingers through the trigger guard, nor give them the flexibility to raise the pistol to their head. It's heartbreaking."

The report included detailed illustrations of extremely overweight people unable to bend over far enough to fit their heads into ovens, bobbing like corks while attempting to drown themselves, and becoming too winded scaling stairs to reach heights from which they could hurl their enormous bulk with fatal results. Another researcher at the Obesity Pathology Clinic has developed a computer model which demonstrates that even if the obese were able to jump off a skyscraper, their bodies would be "more likely to bounce than splat."

Yet health experts say that there is hope for these hulking individuals.

"The fat need to improve their eating habits and commit to a modest exercise regimen, even if it starts with just walking from room to room inside their houses," said Dianne Evans, a specialist at the Johns Hopkins Center for Public Health. "If they keep that up for six to 12 months, most of these people could lose enough weight to be able to kill themselves with relative ease."

But Evans warned that losing too much weight too fast could have serious repercussions.

"What you want to avoid is a situation where someone comes down from 320 pounds to 240 in the span of a single year, and suddenly does not have the suicidal urges they once did," said Evans, who explained that the "sweet spot" of self-hatred and physical suicidal ability is extremely small. "If they mistake their all-but-meaningless improvement for a legitimate reason to live, their fat, revolting lives may be prolonged indefinitely.

The above is courtsey of The Onion News Network.....

BOLOGNESE RAGU ALA FETTIT

When I arrived home tonight, fresh vegetables were sauteing and Fettit was elbow deep in ground turkey, sausage, beef and chicken livers. Why you ask?

He was making Bolognese Ragu.

Fettit was trying to recreate the meal we had last night at Giuseppe's on 28th, a non-descript, tiny restaurant in a strip mall not far from the house. You wouldn't even give the place a second glance if it wasn't for the three by ten foot banner that hangs in front of the place like a beacon that states "AS SEEN ON FOOD NETWORK'S DINERS, DRIVE-INS AND DIVES."

In the end he was successful. His Bolognese Ragu was every bit as good as Richard Bock's, the owner of Giuseppe's on 28th - only with more meat.

ALL THESE BOOKS ARE CONFUSING ME

I just finished updating the "Books I am Reading" and I realized that I am in the middle of five very different books. Oh wait, it is actually only four:

Four weeks ago, or so, I was at Sam's Club and I picked up South of Broad by Pat Conroy. I hadn't been reading for several months and I found I couldn't put the book down and once I was completed I decided I needed something to replace it with so I got Rainwater by Sandra Brown.

I was enjoying it but one a trip to the store I saw Why We Suck by Dennis Leary and Knock Out (Curing Cancer) by Suzanne Somers. I purchased both of them and started reading both, even though I wasn't finished with Rainwater.

Last week while listening to Rosie O'Donnell on her new Sirius/XM radio show "Rosie Radio," she mentioned The Velvet Rage (Overcoming the Pain of Growing Up Gay in a Straight Man's World) by Alan Downs so I immediately went to Amazon.com and found the book, in hard cover, for only $4.99. I placed an order and it arrived yesterday. I am now about 1/6th of the way through it.

In a single day I will pick up each of them at various times through the day and read a few pages. By the time I fall asleep each night I am confused as hell.

I now think that gays are curing cancer and Suzanne Somers is funny as hell in a straight man's world.

Add to the mix Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen. Fortunately it sits on my bed stand and I haven't confused myself further - I have not even cracked the binding.