Sunday, January 13, 2008


Have you ever been backstage at a theater production? The facade is never as it appears and behind the stage it is always messy. There are people running around making sure that what appears on stage is perfect and no audience member sees the strings being pulled.

The theater goer never sees the backstage happenings - The magic and the smoke and mirrors…. The curtain fell about 33 hours ago……

If you live backstage this is normal - not so if you live in the real world - you see it all! Living in the live world requires you to see the smudged makeup and the dusty wigs, the ill prepared actor and actress, and the paint peeling from the scenery walls.

My friends, each of you, are players in someone’s game. This is not Deal or No Deal. Truth or Consequences is more like it.

I have stewed and stirred because at my core I believe in loyalty and truth.

The slap in the face was easy! What happened afterwards was more difficult to take. I am an adult! I never expected to be abused by one of my caretakers.

Thankfully reality intervened and for a few hours I was able to put aside the chaos that has become my past time.

Something went a rye and those I thought I knew have become strangers. My questions are many but I know the answers will never be forthcoming.

In a place of truth, acceptance and love, lives reality, but reality can be embraced without repercussion and if not it can fester for no reason at all.

I guess in this case the truth doesn’t matter and illusion takes it's place.

Acceptance and love do not excuse foul behavior.. I let you in, and I think I need an explanation.

The truth could easily have been accepted.

Whatever the reason - I feel betrayed!

I am Sorry for Love!


Bobby said...


What an amazing song and photo montage on the video. So loving it...

The words you have written have iced the cake so perfectly! I sit and wonder as you do. At times the complex web of thinking and ideas can lead anyone to assumptions that give no real answers.

Instead we are really faced with asking something so simple; the TRUTH. However, what may be an everyday standard we live in, is not by any means the same for someone else.

A flashlight powered by many souls was flooded upon the shadows, and within those dark places and truth within certain limits was flushed out into another setting.

After reading your wondeful thoughts. I for one, will not focus on the why or how. You are beyond correct in your comparison, and feelings on the matter.

It happened for a reason, and I am moving on with friends by my side. Ones filled with TRUE yellow. Friends whose STARS shine bright even while we sleep....

Hugs Bro!

Manymeez said...

that was beautifully said Chris!

Jake said...

her her chris.
and I LOVE that video montage!
what a little showman you were as a child!

Gpawilli said...

I am well now and I will continue to share my self and my truths.

I am a trusting, open book and that will continue.

Answers are not important!

Be safe and well - blessings

Jenice said...

Weren't you a cutie?!
Not that I've gotten that out of the way, I just have to say that I've been the victim of being an open book and I try so very hard to let it not change me.

meli said...

love you chris... ny = margaritta