HAPPY HALLOWEEN

What follows is a movie of our house this evening. Fettit dressed up, banged on the piano and scared the little kiddies.

Once Upon a Dream

Okay..... I warned many of you that I was going to post this. I was thinking about editting it (somehow) but I know I would just put it off forever and in the end chicken out.....

This is a clip of me singing "Once Upon A Dream" from the musical Jekyl and Hyde at last Friday night's Halloween Party. The clip is very raw, not complete from start to finish and I flub up some as well.

DISCLAIMER

It was probably one or two o'clock in the morning. It could have been even later. I had had too much to drink and I was singin like I had a mouthful of marbles. Listen to how I am pronouncing my esses. We laughed ourselves silly yesterday listening to my annunciation.

Judge me as you must..... God knows I am my harshes critic and SERIOUSLY can't believe I am posting it.

I'm not as embarrassed as I should be... What the HELL... The party was a blast!

ENJOY... or..........

2007 HALLOWEEN PARTY - PHOTO REQUEST

IF ANYONE FROM FRIDAY NIGHT'S PARTY HAS ADDITIONAL PHOTOGRAPHS I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE THEM EMAILED TO ME - OR IF THEY ARE NOT DIGITAL I CAN SCAN A COPY AS WELL.

PLEASE LET ME KNOW.

THANKS

2007 HALLOWEEN PARTY

Fifty family members and friends (several from other states) joined us Friday night to celebrate Halloween a few days early. In attendance were ghouls and witches and clowns and whorish bridesmaids. There was even one HUGE LADY who was scarier looking than all the others combined.

Aren't I pretty?

Enjoy!

The Young and The Restless

I received the following email this evening from my WONDERFUL brother... and it sums up how I feel about The Young and The Restless and of course its only true star.... Miss Jeanne Cooper

I know its a soap opera.... but these people (and Katherine Chancellor) have been in our lives longer than ALL of our step fathers...

I love Kevin's email.....I hope he doesn't mind that I posted it.... but he is one of the funniest people I know and most everything he says comes from an incredible place in his heart. This is the brother that just celebrated his birthday that I went home for.........

Howdy,
Oh my God have you been watching Y&R? I cant imagine my life without Mrs C. How many years have we been watching the "Grand Dame" of all things "Chancellor"? If they were to kill off "Kay" I would have to go to the funeral. Partly because it would be sooo wonderful (and the Emmy for "best funeral of a soap character who never actually lived) goes too......... Her talking today about all the mistakes "she" has made in her life. (talking to Amber, I know you don't like her but I do). "Glass houses" and all that. Who among us hasn't had one to many drinks, or slept with the wrong person, or driven our husbands off a cliff to his death. ( Actually that last one I have never really done but have fantasized about doing it once......... maybe twice......... okay maybe 100 times. But at least Mrs. C had the drunk on to do it!! Anyway (she) "Jill's Mom" was wonderful today (Wednesdays show). But watching her all I could think about was how much I would miss her if she wasn't there. Yes I have been addicted to this show ever since high school and yes I do know they are not real people (it has been pointed out to me several times over the years by Craig) but..........these people have been more reliable in my life than most family and friends. At least I know where to find them Monday-Friday. Craig laughs at Bart Simpson and Homer. So what is wrong about crying when "Ryan" Died, Nicki lost a baby, or Mrs C. sings "I am going to live till I die"!!?? Isn't that a wonderful life goal? Well I do plan on "Living till I die, I'm going to laugh till I cry, I am going to live..live...live.. till I die!!

Oh and by the way someone let Cain know "I am ABLE"!!!! And have there ever been two more beautiful letters? JT!!!!! I'd climb an elevator shaft in a heart beat if I was behind one of them!! Love the new Young and the Restless!!

Ok I have to go I need to get some sleep. I actually am in the country tomorrow till 4p.m. so can watch it live. I know its taped but its live to me. If that fucking Bush preempts it I am going to freak! VICTOR NEWMAN FOR PRESIDENT!! Please someone tell me Bush and his brainless horsemen are just a bad soap. Quick change the channel! Talk about a show that should be canceled for bad acting!! People talk about too much sex on TV. Well every time that dumb ass has a news conference he is "Fucking" millions of people and ITS LIVE!!
ok, nite nite!!
Your big Bro, Kevin (my soap name would be Cage) Yes I like that "Cage"!!

You can see why I love him so much..... he is a great comedic writer... or is it just that I know exactly what he is saying?

THE WIZARD OF OZ - ALTERNATE ENDING

For the past few days we have been scrambling around trying to come up with costumes for are Halloween Party. Finally on Sunday we placed an order. Fettit is going to be the tinman (how appropriate - watch the video), our current wayward housemate, Rich, is going to be the scarecrow, and I was going to go as the Wicked Witch of the West. Notice I said Was? I received an email from the costume company yesterday stating they are out of my costume.

I'm at a lose. Last night I spent the entire evening trying to find a costume and I am having no luck. I searched so much that I continuously dreamed of the Wizard of Oz.

Yesterday Matt told Fettit and me about a funny Wizard of Oz Madtv skit and coincidentally this morning when I pulled up Youtube (ooking for a clip for another blog entry I've been working on) there it was right on the front page.

I think its cute.... so I have included it below ... but it doesn't help me get a costume.

I have one day before the party........ What should my costume be?

WHAT DO AMERICANS VALUE

I recently started listening to Air America, the radio network dedicated to progressive ideas. On one of the shows today there was a story about a hardworking American couple who are about to lose their house because the wife was diagnosed with an advanced form of cancer and they do not have health insurance.

This is just one story in thousands, maybe even tens of thousands.

Your neighbors who worked 60 hours a week to make ends meet, celebrated the birth of your children, kept their lawn manicured, and helped shuttle your children to soccer practice are losing their houses and their lives.

They are no different than you. Their values are your values. They love their children, have helped take care of their parents, and paid their taxes.

America is the riches nation on the earth. Our government spends billions of dollars on nonsensical congressional pet projects. We send billions of aid to other countries, but most importantly we are currently spending one trillion dollars on the liberation and occupation of Iraq – which is now in the middle of a civil war.

We can spend one trillion dollars killing thousands of American soldiers and several hundred thousand innocent Iraqi children, women and men, but we can not offer affordable or free health care to our citizens?

What is wrong with us?

Where are our morals?

As a country what do we value?

The Conservative Christian movement shouts from every television news show that the United States of America was a nation built on Christian principles. Where is the Christian principle in letting the country’s children and poor die or be kicked out onto the streets? How is it that a choice needs to be made between food and medical care, or housing and prescription drugs?

And while I am on the Christians - I am certain that Honoring thy father and mother doesn’t primarily mean not talking back. It also means ensuring they are given proper medical care and are not forced to live in their car.

How did this country get so far from its belief in, and care for, its people? When was it decided that invading countries that could do no harm to us was more important than making certain that every American - our children and elderly included – is receiving proper medical care?

American corporations are making record profits, stocks are at an all-time high, and yet medical benefits are denied to one-fifth of the American population. One in five honest, hardworking Americans are without adequate healthcare.

Corporate America once took care of their employees. That is a thing of the past. While their profits climb to unfathomable levels their employees cannot afford to pay for their doctor visits or prescriptions. There are more working poor now than ever in the history of this country – and yet we remain the world’s wealthiest citizens.

When are we going to elect representatives to Washington who share the belief that our citizens are important? That children matter and we value or senior citizens? When are we going to hold our representatives to the principle that all Americans deserve healthcare – not just the wealthy?

Which congressmen or senator is going to realize that every American deserves the same health benefits they receive and that each CEO in the country takes for granted? More importantly, when are we going to elect a President who works for the best interest of the electorate instead of his wealthy fraternity buddies?

As usual, I am outraged that we have allowed our government to ignore us, take us for granted and spit in our faces as they and their corporate brothers line their pockets and plan more wars to continue the generous of military wealth.

Not a week goes by without me sending an email or letter to one of my representatives – but nothing seems to change – and we need a change.

We all need to talk to anyone who will listen to us. We need to be writing letters and emails, we need to be blogging, and we need to be loud and unified in our belief that people deserve more, and are worth more healthy and alive than sickly, on the streets or dead – and that if our government does wake up and change – we will change our government.

HAPPY 27TH ANNIVERSARY

Today would have been my 27th wedding anniversary! I cannot believe it.

I was a child bride.... I mean Groom!

BRITNEY - QUEEN OF FRANCE aka LEAVE AMERICA

Here is a new What the Buck. In this episode Michael Buckley encourages Britney Spears to go after France's president to become their first lady.

I love this blog... I get to talk about politics, trannies and talentless, divorced pop-stars.... all in one place.

2007 - THE YEAR OF THE TRANNY PART TWO

I found the Candis Cayne segment from The View and decided to post it. She is quite striking!

ENJOY

2007 - THE YEAR OF THE TRANNY

My friend J over at www.awriterdodgingbullets.com has written a few entries regarding the search words people use that lead them to her website. She has had some colorful ones that I won’t go into here but if you are interested, you can read her entries at her site - she is thoughtful and wise and a refreshing writer.

No one has found their way to my site via any off-color or out-of-the-norm searches - that is until today. All the previous searches have been for individuals – either friends or family.

Like my friend Matt. I have had two or three people find their way to 2288 Beckley Rd by searching Google for his name – first and last name. My site is listed third when searching his name in Google. First there is his employer’s website, his personal website (which I wish he would update and blog), and then mine.

I have also had hits from people looking for another friend of mine named Matt. Surprisingly my site is listed first in Google. There have also been searches for other random people like my step sister, Lori, and even my granddaughter, Noelle.

My initial thought when I saw that yahoo and Google searches bring people to my site is that it must be people looking for themselves - bored, sitting at home with nothing pressing to do, while playing on the computer they Google themselves.

However, in these cases that isn’t the case. In addition to seeing the results of the searches brought to my site, I also see the searcher’s country, city, and state and it’s never been either Matt (one in Tucson and one in New York). The searches come from cities unknown to me in random states like Connecticut and Missouri.

My luck changed today. No more boring name search results.

This afternoon I log into my tracking site and there it was – someone came to my site while searching - Straight Cross-dressers.

Now, I am not a straight cross-dresser and I won’t admit to ever being one either. I’m also not straight, and I don’t think a little fun around the house on a Saturday night or Halloween make me a full fledged cross-dresser.

Oddly enough, I have noticed that transvestites and transsexuals are big this year. The television is lousy with them this year.

It seems that since the beginning of her new season, a week doesn’t go by without Oprah devoting a show to transsexuals. She has even had young children on the show who feel they were born in the wrong body.

On the new ABC television show Dirty Sexy Money there is a transsexual character played by a real-life transsexual, Candis Cayne. I turned on The View the other day and she was on that show too.

I think trannies are the new gays - how chic!
When I saw the results for the “straight cross-dresser” I knew immediately who, and what, lead them to my site. It is the picture of my Provincetown neighbor, Al/Helen, taken nearly ten years ago.

This man has a successful business career but has a little secret his friend and family don’t know. During the summer Al leaves his wife in another state, and comes to Provincetown to become Helen.

I wonder if I should take down Al/Helen’s picture because if anyone Googles Al and Provincetown together or Helen and Provincetown my site would come up and I would hate to ruin his life – you know - his family looks at my website and finds his picture and they figure out it’s their father or husband…Wouldn’t that give his family the surprise of their lives?

Okay.. I just looked…I Googled both Al and Helen, along with the word Provincetown and my site didn’t come up… at least in the first few pages…phew

NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND

What exactly does "No Child Left Behind" mean?

It doesn't mean education....

and it CERTAINLY doesn't mean health care.

It's all smoke and mirrors!!!

HOW THE GRINCH STOLE AMERICA

It is clear to me that our current administration, King George and Evil Dick, are in office for one reason, and one reason only. Greed.

Their “War of Terror “ as Borat called it, and rightly so, was never about making America more secure or free from nuclear threats or airplane flying suicide bombers.

We all now know that even before the crazies flew the planes into the World Trade Center and the Pentagon, the White House was at work on a plan to overthrow and replace the government in Iraq. The happenings on September 11th only made it easier to sell.

In the week prior to September 11th, 2001, Halliburton’s stock fell 44% and in July 2002 a share of Halliburton stock was going for less than nine dollars. Today Halliburton’s stock price has increased over 500% . That is quite a profit for King George and his friends.

I don’t have to remind anyone who was Halliburton’s CEO from 1995 to 2000, do I? None other than our Vice President, Evil Dick. He left Halliburton to head George W Bush’s vice presidential selection committee. Isn’t that a great story? I can see him telling little Georgie, ““Umm…I think you should nominate…umm.. ME… Yeah… I think I should be your vice president.”

While American families mourn the death of their children and middle income families pay for King George and Evil Dick’s Iraqi occupation for the next 25 years, they will leave office (not soon enough) with bags of cash.



In my mind I see them both dressed up like Dr. Suess’ Grinch on Christmas Eve…. sneaking down the chimney of every American home, robbing each house of all their cash (and everything else) and then trying to stuff their oversized bags back up the chimney.

WHERE HAVE ALL THE LEADERS GONE

World War II was the granddaddy of all wars - destruction, devastation and death. An unprovoked tyrannical dictator and murder broke down boarders and invaded his neighbors.

Germany’s army during World War II was 17 million soldiers strong. They had over one million “SS” soldiers alone. We captured and held 300,000 German prisoner/soldiers during that war.

How many Nazi soldiers did we torture?

ZERO

Unlike our current regime, the men who managed World War II were great and noble. In the mid 20th century being American meant something. We were a country of ideals, morals and ethics and the entire world looked at us with admiration and respect.

Today, George Bush is no different than Adolf Hilter. He and his friends have attacked a sovereign nation without provocation and the world looks at us with disdain and in some cases, and rightfully so, fear.

During World War II we captured 300,000 Nazi soldiers and did not torture a single one of them, and yet we won the war. Today, according to the United States government, we are fighting a rag-tag group of approximately 3,000 Al-Qaeda militants – one percent of the total prisoners of war we held during World War II.

And yet we are reduced to using torture!

It is time for the American people to stand up and say “Enough is Enough.” We need to let the world know we are not behind this current president and his policies. We need to ARREST THE WAR CRIMINALS and bring them to justice!

MY FUTURE TRAVEL PLANS

I love to travel. I like to escape from the day-to-day to visit strange places. I love to see new and old lands, buildings, and people, and every year it is troublesome trying to coordinate, plan and afford to visit each place.

For some time now I have been wanting to organize my thoughts regarding vacations.
My belief was that if I put together a spreadsheet to keep track of all the places I wanted to visit - either for a weekend or as much as three weeks - I might be able to start planning some of the trips far in advance and start putting money aside to afford them.

So what follows is my list. Starting in order of my desire to visit, I assigned a number to every location in each category - and there are four categories.

There are some places I like to go every year...at least once. These are long weekend trips so they rarely cost vacation time and if they do its never more than one day. I try to coordinate them with a holiday to give me three or four days. They are as follows:

1 Michigan to Visit Family
2 New York, NY
3 Chicago, IL
4 Long Beach, CA
5 Palm Springs, CA
6 Sedona, AZ

I then put together a list of places I would like to visit for long weekends with some frequency but not necessarily ever year - maybe every third or fourth year. Remember, this is ideally.

1 Provincetown, MA
2 Miami Beach, FL
3 Black Hills of South Dakota
4 Burlington, VT in the Fall
5 San Francisco, CA
6 Washington DC

After that it is long weekends that I would like to do just once. These are places I have never visited or have visited and enjoyed myself enough that I would like to return.

1 Clinton Presidential Library, Little Rock, AR
2 Savannah, GA
3 San Antonio, TX for Fiesta
4 Yosemite National Park
5 Napa Valley
6 Bryce Canyon National Pk
7 Zion National Park
8 CA Central Coast Wineries
9 Austin, TX
10 Denver, CO

From there it is on to full fledged vacations. Due to the distance and the need for several days to sight see these trips would take seven to ten days.

1 Auschwitz (Poland), Germany, Prague, and Amsterdam
2 Idaho, Montana and Glacier National Pk
3 London and England
4 Paris and France
5 Italy
6 Spain and Portugal
7 Alaska
8 Vietnam
9 Brazil
10 Peru, Ecuador, Argentina and Chile
11 Puerto Rico
12 Central America

Somehow I need to fit a week each year on the beach in Hawaii too.

I would also like to go to Australia for three or four weeks sometime. Because of the distance, everyone I know has gone there for a minimum of three weeks. The same is true of Africa but that is probably the lowest on my list.

When Noelle is either nine or ten years old I plan to retrace the steps Sydney and Sara and I took (the same steps I took with my grandparents during the summer of my tenth birthday) to the Black Hills and Yellowstone National Park. I figure that will be in about 2016.

There is also one odd trip I would like to take with Fettit some day. Ya see... Fettit loves weather and we have talked about taking a vacation to Tornado Alley. I am intrigued and would like to see a tornado, whereas Fettit is a weather freak and WOULD LOVE TO SEE A TORNADO... and to possibly chase one.

If we don't get there before retirement (and God knows Fettit doesn't like leaving Phoenix) we will definitely be doing it after we retire.

Okay... I have to go pack my bags. This is gotten me in the mood for a trip..... hmmmm.... Where can I go next?

How about you? Where would you like to visit (either a favorite or new place)? What is your favorite long weekend trip?

I've learned my list isn't 100% comprehensive. Since writing it and posting it I remembered that I would like to visit Toronto, Montreal, and the Maritime Provinces, and go back and spend more time in Vancouver. As I remember them I will put them in the comments.

TAP DANCING SENATOR'S REQUEST DENIED

A judge has denied tap dancing Senator Larry Craig’s request to withdraw his guilty plea stemming from his arrest in a Minneapolis restroom.

HURRAY!!!!

I am sorry that this man was born fifty years too early and couldn’t come out and live his life openly and honestly, but that doesn’t excuse his rabid support for all thing anti-gay.

He told Matt Lauer, in an interview to air on Tuesday’s Today Show that it was a "tough call" not to tell anyone about the incident.

"I didn't want to embarrass my wife, my kids, Idaho and my friends," Craig said. "And I wrestled with it a long while. ... I should have told my wife. I should have told my kids. And most importantly, I should have told counsel."

LIAR – you were hoping it would quietly go away so you wouldn’t embarrass yourself. If he was innocent he would have immediately told his wife and family and started a proper defense.

The good people of Idaho need to demand this LIAR resign as he promised to do some weeks ago and needs to accept himself and stop lying to his wife.

NEW NOELLE VIDEO

We usually get Noelle every Saturday but this weekend she had other plans. I decided to make a movie of her instead.

Enjoy!

WHAT THE BUCK - THE VIEW SUCKS

This video clip is a few weeks old but I just stumbled across it. I forgot all about "What The Buck" but this clip reminds me how much I enjoy it. He makes me laugh.... OUT LOUD!

There are a few colorful words in the clip so please don't watch if you are a tight ass like Elizabitch - oh "What The Buck" watch and complain because ... NBC - No Body Cares!

Just kidding of course!!


Okay... so I watched another episode and have included it too.... I apologize but he is funny!

America's Number One Enemy

While I contemplate part two of my Celebrity Detox review I have to rant about America's number one enemy.

Can you guess who I think is America's Number One enemy is?

No I'm not talking about the deceased Saddam Hussein
No I'm not talking about King George or Evil Dick
No I'm not talking about Mahmoud Imaneedahanjob

The person that hates America more than anyone is horse face Ann Coulter.

Ann hates all WIDOWS OF SEPTEMBER 11TH
Ann hates all BLACKS
Ann hates all GAYS
Ann hates all LATINS
Ann hates all NATIVE (REAL) AMERICANS
Ann hates all POOR
Ann hates all SENIORS
Ann hates all NON REPUBLICANS
Ann hates all NON CHRISTIANS

Ann probably hates all diabled people
Ann probably hates all seeing eye dogs
Ann probably hates all left handed people
Ann probably hates all non-missionary position people
Ann probably hates all babies
Ann probably hates all kittens
Ann probably hates HER PARENTS (or is that the other way around?)

Ann Coulter is anti-American and she needs to be tortured!

Oh yeah... I found this funny clip.... I had to include it:

CELBRITY DETOX - A LETTER FROM A PEN PAL

(This entry has been editted since it was originally posted)
Did you ever have a pen pal?

Pen Pals were peculiarly kind of cool back in the early to mid seventies. They were almost like reading the private messages in a bottle that floated on the waves of the ocean, eventually opened and read by complete strangers - today it would be the equivalent of internet buddies - but more anonymous.

My Grandma Willi encouraged me went I was a preteen to correspond with a distant cousin in Germany. I cannot remember her name now, but there was a brief period of correspondence between my Michigan home and Baden-Württemberg, Germany.

Back in the day pen pal letters were like receiving a one person monologue, written by someone you most likely would never meet. This being the case you could be completely honest and let the real you show. You may even have exchanged photographs also, but even so, you never felt like your pen pal was a real person who could ever turn on you and spill your secrets to the world.

Writing those letters was like writing in your journal or diary except that you mailed it off and several weeks later you would receive a response - and the response may be about something you wrote, but more than likely you received a one sided monologue like the one you sent, explaining your trivial life - either several states away or oceans away.

This is my take on “Celebrity Detox – The Fame Game” written by Rosie O’Donnell (along with ghost writer Lauren Slater) and published by Grand Central Publishing.

Celebrity Detox is not intended to be Hemingway or Poe. It is an intimate glimpse into the every day life of an American Pop-Culture Exclamation Point.

I will tell you up front - I am biased. I love Rosie O’Donnell but I am not in awe of her celebrity or fame. I see Rosie as a peer - as the chunky, loud mouthed girl next door (although she was not chunky back then) who could have been my childhood friend. I had a few chunky, loud mouth girl friends growing up.

Rosie, however, was never just the girl next door. She was the class president and homecoming queen who grew up to be the Queen of Nice, and for a few years was loved and watched my millions.

When I first saw Rosie in the movies I was struck at how my attention was always drawn to her - more so than the stars of the movie like Tom Hanks, Gena Davis, Meg Ryan or Madonna. She truly has the “IT” factor that everyone talks about but few people have.

Still…I am reading Celebrity Detox like it is a personal letter sent just to me. In it she explains (to me) what she has gone through over the past few years and exactly what she has felt at every turn – from deciding to give up her popular television show, spending time with her children and shopping at Target, to reentering the limelight out of respect for Barbara Walters and longing for a mother figure. She discusses the tumultuous times on The View, including the arguments with Elizabeth Hasselbeck (Elizabitch), and her admiration for Joy Behar who felt threatened when she joined with show.

I am currently on page 79 of 209 and I enjoy how Rosie is true to herself, and the reader. She explains in raw detail just what it is like to be a celebrity in this star obsessed culture. She gives a glimpse into the life, and lifestyles, of the rich and famous, and unlike ALL other celebrity written books, she doesn't try to make herself out to be greater or bigger or more special than she really is!

And for that I give the book a HELL YEAH.

I admire and love ya Ro and I can't wait to finish the rest of the book and see where your next step takes you!

SLEEPING BEAUTY

THIS IS HOW I AM FEELING TONIGHT SO I AM OFF TO BED!


I WILL TRY TO BE WITTY OR THOUGHT PROVOKING TOMORROW.


JUST CAN'T BE TONIGHT!

SWEENEY TODD-THE DEMON BARBER OF FLEET STREET

Opening December 21st is a movie I have been looking forward to for many years. I always enjoyed the music and listening to my friend Matt tell me about the story.

The original starred Angela Lansbury of Murder She Wrote fame. I was fortunate to see the recent revival starring Patti Lupone and Michael Cerveris. The staging and direction blew me away, as did the story and the music.

The Stephen Sondheim musical is a dark and haunting, twisted tale of revenge. The story revolves around the murdering barber, Sweeney Todd, and Mrs Lovett, his pie-making accomplice, who disposes of the victims' bodies in an eerie, yet entrepreneurial fashion.

One of my favorite songs "Not While I'm Around," comes from this show and it also includes the haunting "Joanna," the highly inventive "A Little Priest" as well as the Broadway standard "Pretty Women."

The movie is directed by Tim Burton, the man behind Edward Scissorhands, Ed Wood, the remake of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and many other offbeat movies, and it stars one of my favorite actors, Johnny Depp, as well as Helena Bonham Carter, and Borat himself, Sacha Baron Cohen, and Alan Rickman.

Although I have not seen the movie I highly recommend it based on the story, the music, the cast and the often warped vision of Tim Burton.

IT'S ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA

For those that have not seen "Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia" this is a little clip. I love this show. It's on Thursday nights on FX and they show two episodes in a row. It comes on at 10pm in Arizona so probably 11pm in the eastern and pacific time zones. It is not for everyone but I love the irreverent humor and the adult and real-world language - unlike the regular broadcast networks. In this case it's gay humor and... well... watch for yourself and I'd love to hear what everyone thinks.... The second clip is an American Idol rip-off. I think the girl is funny as Paula...I'm not drunk I'm just really exhausted..........

2288 BECKLEY RD REDUX

A few days prior to making my surprise trip back to Michigan for Kevin’s and Craig's birthday I received the following email from Kevin. I thought it was perfect to include here. I have edited it some but the words are all his:






… I stopped at 2288 Beckley Rd yesterday and talked to the woman
who now owns it. They bought it for near to nothing and she gave me a
tour of the house they are building on it. The house will sit like just
behind where the garage was.

The place is gorgeous.

The man building it is a local building inspector and he specializes in
wood. So he is doing it all himself and the wood inside is wonderful -
solid cherry throughout.

The big two story windows that Larry had put on his addition are going
to be the entrance to their family room off the back of the house. They
are tearing down his addition and just leaving enough of the old place
for a wood working shop. Grandpa and Grandmas house is all gone but the
foundation. That’s it.

The woman also told me they sold 3 acres in the back to someone who has an
excavation business. He has a big storage building for equipment and is
building a big house back there.

The woman was very nice and seemed thrilled to hear stories of the house.
They are actually building this home for their daughter and her 3 little
kids with the idea that one day they (mom and dad) will move in when they
get too old to be alone. The basement will have quarters for them and a
kitchen using Grandma and Grandpa’s old cupboards.

I was telling her how wonderful the yard had been in our youth and she
asked me to send pictures. I gave her your website to look at.

So the place will now be blessed with the laughter of children. I think
that it’s wonderful that others will be able to learn, grow and love
where we used to. One day they will look back at 2288 Beckley Rd with
the same fondness as us. I just hope the little fuckers can dodge BBs
because I plan many a drive by just to make they remember whose turf
they are standing on.





Kevin is often touching and always funny.

While home I had some time to kill prior to the party so I drove to 2288 Beckley Rd. I stopped and took some photos.

Looking now all I see there is a couple of new buildings and fifteen years of neglect. I want to hop on the riding lawnmower and whip the once park-like lawn back into Nixon-era shape.

I can’t drive by without hearing the love-filled gruff voice of my grandfather or see him in the yard mowing. I can see grandma in the kitchen and can smell the foods of my childhood. In many ways I am a captive of that time and am easily reduced to feeling like the young boy I was there.

I too think it’s wonderful that the place will again be enjoyed by people who will love it and nurture it. The trees plants by my grandparents and father, and tended by me and my brothers will be enjoyed again and the sounds of laughter will return to the yard as echoes of our childhood.

I hope the new children inherit the gifts and traditions of love, laughter, and family just as we carry them with as to this day.

Each time I read Kevin's email it brings me to tears - knowing that 2288 Beckley Rd no longer truly exists for us, however, as long as it remains in our hearts it can never be taken from us.

WEEKEND CORRECTION

I received a call a few minutes ago from my brother who wanted to inform me that I failed to mention that Miss Sara, his car that received the infinitesimal scratch on the bumber, is in fact a Cadillac.

I apologize for the ommission. It was not intentional... ya crazy-eyed freak.

Hope you are feeling the love!

WHAT A WEEKEND

I have returned and what a whirlwind, wonderful weekend. I was able to make my way back to Kalamazoo without anyone finding out, therefore, there was a surprise involved.

Late in the afternoon Friday we called a taxi cab to take us to the airport. US Airways automatically upgraded us to first class which caused an unexpected problem for Fettit. Can you imagine…getting a first class upgrade being a problem? I can’t!

Fettit’s sister flew through Phoenix on her way back to Michigan and we coordinated our flights so we could fly together; however, we were upgraded. Fettit felt compelled to sit in the back with her; however, when we got to the airport we learned the flight was sold out. Later we learned her flight was delayed so we debated whether to board before she arrived at the gate or when they first announced boarding.

I like to board early so I left Fettit at the gate waiting for Donna, or I thought I left him at the gate waiting for Donna, but when I got to the airplane door he was right on my heals. We put away our carry-ons, ordered a gin and tonic and a vodka and soda and waited for his sister to board.

Donna boarded the plane and instantly glared in our direction. She learned in Salt Lake City we had been seated in first class so she knew exactly where to look when she entered the plane and came aboard loaded for bear…supposedly joking, but I think she was bothered. She knew we had no choice but it still upset her.

I wonder if it bothered her more on the way home - we were upgraded again.

The flight was uneventful, including my sad spinach and walnut salad and Fettit’s Curry Chicken pasta. The drinks flowed liberally but not too much that I couldn’t drive safely. We sent Donna a glass of wine to the back and the flight attendant got a huge laugh when Fettit asked the her (quite seriously) if he could send his pie four rows back. She told him it was the funniest request she had ever received.

The party on Saturday was a smashing success (WATCH THE VIDEO). My crazy-eyed, good looking 50 year old brother with a clown-sized smile was genuinely surprised when I arrived. Although he initially believed I was coming home, my scent went cold when his lovely, long lost daughter surprised him and flew into Grand Rapids with his youngest granddaughter.

Starting with my unexpected arrival, there was plenty of excitement and laughs throughout the evening. Usually understated, my oldest brother Frank pretended to sing with the birthday quartet, lip-syncing the words and making funny faces and acting like he belonged.

Near the end of the evening a drunken bar patron backed up into two cars making then look like conjoined twins and Kevin, whose car was in the next spot practically hopped over the two story railing to find that his car was also involved. Screaming like his hair was in fire, he learned his bumper was slightly scratched; however the scratch was only visible with a jeweler’s loupe.

My nephew Steve rushed to Kevin’s defense when a passer-by called him Elton John and he proceeded to hit on the female cop telling her that he “likes a woman with a gun.” She shot him down without a bullet.

Later he disappointed a "MILF" by passing out on her during the drive home as friends and family members lusted over an extended cousin model with a killer smile and two nieces couldn’t hold on to the bucking bull long enough tame the beast.

The next day, after spending time with family, I drove the back roads to Fenton (2 hours away) to join the Motown lesbian cookout, but didn’t arrive soon enough to have grilled food with Fettit’s sister Clara or to see her passionate flower.

I did arrive in time to encounter an uncomfortable lesbian love connection that lead to drama for all those in attendance and the scheduled bonfire was postponed by two hours as we attempted to remove the clods and dead weeds from the fire-ring.

The weather was unseasonably warm for late September until Monday when we received a special gift. It rained all day so we drove to Detroit and lost our king crab leg money at the casino so we had to feed Ma and Pa Bishba Stouffer’s lasagna.

Yesterday we arrived home early in the morning and all I could think about seeing Noelle and getting Eddie B home. Within a couple of hours Noelle was running down the driveway screaming “Papa… Papa.”

We kept her overnight and then she was off to her first night at the daycare. She is getting so big and at 21 months can count to three. I spent time reading to her and having her name the different colors and fell in love listening to her say purple.

I think she is a genius and the cutest child ever born. I was looking at her last night and had a flashback. She looked just like her mother and for an instant my eyes started to welled up.

Later we took her out to dinner and as we were leaving the restaurant she stopped by every table to say goodbye. She is just too damn cute!